is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Randomize