trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize