I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
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