Kiss
Puke
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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