try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize