Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
My breasts were aching with rage.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
So vagazzling was a success
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Randomize
