The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
