Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Randomize
