sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Randomize
