my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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