I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
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