walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Bring me that man meat
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Randomize
