Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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