i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
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