Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
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