I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
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