Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple