Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing