I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
