Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Randomize
