So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
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