Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
