After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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