Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.