our cab driver is having phone sex.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Randomize
