I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Randomize
