Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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