Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
