Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
