it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
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I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
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I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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