Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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