Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
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