dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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