all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
