i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
