i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
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