Whoa Z and x make the same sound
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
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