Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Randomize
