? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
25 People Admit the Worst Things They’ve Done for Good Reasons
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
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We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys