There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
