I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
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my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I can't turn off my feet"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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