you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
