last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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