I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Randomize
