I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Randomize
