you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
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