I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
FUCK WHALES
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
