guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
