I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
be right there i have to get my cape
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
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