"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
you would pick up someone in the library
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize