no. you can't hotbox the world.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
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The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
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I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
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