i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
We need a shit load of segways right now
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Randomize
