I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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